Arsenal Confirm Plan To Replace Clock End Timepiece With Wenger Out-O-Meter

Arsenal have confirmed via social media their plan to replace the iconic Arsenal Clock with a meter showing how close manager Arsène Wenger is to being sacked.

The Gunners will use the roundel – a replica of the original version first used at Highbury over seventy years ago – to indicate fan’s support of the long-running boss, which will be taken from a real-time Twitter poll running throughout Arsenal’s first team matches.

The meter will be split into two sides, #WengerOut, and #InArseneWeTrust, and is expected to turn from side to side continuously, as fans change their opinion of the Frenchman wildly over the course of ninety minutes, depending on the score at any given time.

Chief Executive Officer Ivan Gazidis told ‘We’re really excited to be able to take advantage of our amazing online fanbase in this way. Even though the vast majority of them have never been to the Emirates Stadium, and couldn’t spot Martin Hayes in a police lineup, it’s a fantastic opportunity to engage with the club. Especially as our long-time season ticket holders don’t really want to anymore, and only go because they’re scared of losing their seats’.

A dry run of the poll was conducted during Arsenal’s 1-0 defeat to Chelsea over the weekend, although the results couldn’t be seen within the ground. The findings made for interesting reading, with support generally behind #InArseneWeTrust before kick-off, but turning towards #WengerOut when Per Mertesacker was dismissed after eighteen minutes, despite it hardly being Wenger’s fault that the German made the decision to take out Diego Costa. From that point on, #InArseneWeTrust never got a look in.

In addition to the Wenger Out-O-Meter, Gazidis has promised that when support for #WengerOut goes beyond 80 per cent during any given match, a firework display will occur behind the North Bank.