Luke Shaw

Manchester United defender Luke Shaw is determined to look on the bright side after his horrific leg break in his side’s Champions League tie ruled him out for the next six months, after saying that he is relieved that he won’t have to deal with the insufferable security guard who mans the entrance to United’s Carrington training ground complex.

The left back suffered the double fracture of his right leg after a tackle by PSV Eindhoven’s Hector Moreno just fifteen minutes into the opening game of Group B at the Philips Stadion, and was forced to under go immediate surgery at the city’s Saint Anna Ziekenhuis hospital.

However, speaking after the operation, the 20-year-old said: ‘On the brightside, at least I don’t have to see that dickhead security guard for a while. You’d think he’d just let me in by now, but every morning it’s the same thing: “You’re name’s not on the list… the players won’t sign your autograph book son… hey, arsehole, you’re at the wrong training ground, this is City’s one, your lot are across the road”. I won’t be missing him, that’s for sure.

‘And I get to have jelly and ice cream for breakfast, what’s not to like about that?’ Shaw added.

When asked to comment, the security guard in question said: ‘It’s not hard to understand is it? I mean there’s a bloody great big sign right here saying ‘Manchester City’. I know footballers are known for being a bit thick, but he’s taking the piss. Good luck to him though, even if he is a poor man’s Gaël Clichy’.

United lost the tie 2-1 to their Dutch opponents, and will hope to pick up their first win at home to VfL Wolfsburg on September 30.