Manchester United Court Controversy As 38 New Kits Unveiled For 2016/17 Season

Manchester United have released details of thirty-eight new kits for next season, which will be the second under their record deal with kit suppliers Adidas.

The Old Trafford side, not content with releasing a new strip every season as has become the norm, will instead wear a brand new strip for every single Premier League match. Additionally, six special Champions League kits – which can also be easily transferred to any Europa League campaign should they finish outside the top four – will also be produced, paying homage to the more unpopular kits that were designed by previous suppliers Nike.

United’s executive vice-chairman Ed Woodward said: ‘We’re delighted to finally unveil details for all of our new strips for 2016/17. Once more, Manchester United are setting a precedent in sports commercialism that we can all – no matter where in the world you support us – take great pride in’.

An Adidas spokeswoman said: ‘We must admit that this is a strange request from Manchester United, and one we were reluctant to commit to. However, so large is the sponsorship deal (£750 million over ten years) that, fuck it, we need to start making some of that money back’.

Fans have already voiced their discontent, saying that no one could possibly afford to buy all the strips, and Woodward was keen to point out that nobody was sticking a gun to their heads making them buy them, and that not purchasing any kits was perfectly fine, if they didn’t want their club to challenge for the title next season.