Posts Tagged ‘Manchester City’

Representatives for Preston North End have revealed their shock at being invited to join American billionaire Charlie Stillitano’s proposed European Super League, and have said that they would welcome any move that would see them restored to world football’s top table.

Josep Guardiola has decided to move on from Bayern Munich at the end of this season and embark on a journey of career destruction with Manchester City, according to reports in Spain.

Football clubs throughout the world are today on high alert after Manchester City announced plans to redesign their long-standing crest.

Manchester United defender Luke Shaw is determined to look on the bright side after his horrific leg break in his side’s Champions League tie ruled him out for the next six months, after saying that he is relieved that he won’t have to deal with the insufferable security guard who mans the entrance to United’s Carrington training ground complex.

This week featuring the Master of Magnanimity and friend of physiotherapists, Chelsea manager José Mourinho, and Sepp venting his feelings on FIFA being compared to the Mafia.

Teammates of Pablo Zabaleta are said to be ‘disturbed’ at the fact that the Manchester City defender clearly has the legs of a woman, despite being a thirty-year-old man.

Raheem Sterling has completed his controversial move from Liverpool to Manchester City, and has spoken at his delight of becoming the most expensive reserve player of all time.

Sky have announced that they have acquired the film rights to the Raheem Sterling transfer saga, as the winger’s controversial move from Liverpool to Manchester City enters its final stages.

Liverpool are refusing to believe Raheem Sterling’s claim that a sudden loss of his left leg is causing him to miss pre-season training.

James Milner has said that Liverpool’s inability to challenge for top honours and ridiculous wage offer convinced him to sign for the Anfield giants.

There’s an old saying in football that all goalkeepers are crazy, and that’s certainly true for me, for I’m just crazy about battle reenactment

Manchester City, desperate not to miss out on the latest fad currently sweeping football, have confirmed that they have moved to sign fictional Belgian detective Tintin in an attempt to finally solve their creative woes.