Idiots across Great Britain are turning their moronic opinions from current affairs to football as the new season gets underway over the next two weeks.
Sergio Busquets has hinted that Pedro, currently being targeted by Manchester United, may well decide to have kippers for his breakfast instead of his usual bowl of summer fruits.
Louis van Gaal has spoken about his daring new 1-8-1 formation, which he is confident will sweep all before him in the upcoming season at home and abroad.
Sergio Ramos is hoping to force Real Madrid’s hand in his desire to depart the Santiago Bernabéu by releasing a rap single entitled ‘Señor Pérez (Is A Cunt)’, which features lines like ‘If you were the only cunt in the world, I still wouldn’t fuck you’.
Featuring player-hungry Manchester United, saintly Harry Kane, car-botherer Arturo Vidal and more
Manchester United’s Rafael da Silva is suing his twin brother Fábio over what he perceives to be a wholesale infringement of his image rights.
Executive vice-chairman Ed Woodward has explained that by cutting down on football operations, more time can be devoted to developing relationships with luxury brands such as Rolex and Veuve Clicquot.
Manchester United’s executive vice-chairman Ed Woodward today insisted that the club’s appointment of David Moyes in 2013 never actually happened.
Chelsea manager José Mourinho yesterday morning used his daily press conference to allege that he was felched by his Manchester United counterpart Louis van Gaal.