Posts Tagged ‘Newcastle United’

Newcastle United owner Mike Ashley is confident that manager Rafael Benítez will extend his stay at Newcaslte United after offering him £50.00 worth of Sports Direct shop credit.

Following Newcastle’s relegation from the Premier League, club owner Mike Ashley has confirmed that the club will hold a massive closing down sale at the end of the season, with stunning reductions for such items as Andros Townsend and Moussa Sissoko.

Reports coming out of St. James’ Park suggest that manager Steve McClaren has managed to lose the Newcastle United dressing room after insisting on playing Ghostbusters II on the team coach whilst travelling to play their recent away match at Stoke City.

With the January transfer window about to blow open, we look at who could be going where over the next few weeks

Newcastle United fans are today coming to terms with a bizarre emotion known as ‘happiness’ after their team yesterday triumphed 6-2 at home to Norwich City.

As Newcastle United’s failure to impress fans both on and off the football pitch continues unabated, Sky and BT have issued a joint statement saying that all Magpies games next season will be broadcast in standard definition only.

Newcastle United Chairman Mike Ashley has vowed to personally excrete on each and every doorstep in Newcastle-upon-Tyne.