wenger fourth place trophy

The Premier League has officially unveiled its Fourth Place Trophy, following years of campaigning to have it introduced by Arsenal manager Arsène Wenger.

Although the Gunners finished the 2014-15 season in third position, and currently find themselves well placed for a push at winning their first Premier League title since 2004, they have managed to land fourth place an astonishing six times in the last nine seasons. In addition, it would surprise no one if they managed to find themselves occupying the final Champions League spot come the end of this season, so accomplished has Wenger’s side become at achieving the bare minimum expected of them by their long-suffering fans.

Premier League chief executive Richard Scudamore said: ‘We are delighted to, in this instance, bow to pressure from Arsène in sanctioning his request for a FA Premier League Fourth Place Trophy. Arsenal is one of our most famous and well-supported clubs, especially abroad, and deserve praise and indeed physical honours for their continued desire to be the fourth best team in the country. No one has done more to stand still than Arsenal – a level of stubbornness rarely seen these days. Why not give them something for the trophy cupboard?’

Wenger told reporters: ‘I wish to congratulate the Premier League for their forward thinking on this matter. After all, we’re the only team to qualify for the Champions League for sixteen straight years, and even if we never get past the first knockout round, surely we deserve some kind of physical reward for our efforts? Also, we need something else to balance out the Barclays Asia Trophy in the boardroom’.

 Despite this piece of good news for the North London giants, Scudamore was quick to refuse local rival Daniel Levy’s request to create a Fifth-Or-Sixth Place Shield, suggesting that if the Spurs supremo was so keen on having one, he should have used some of the money received from the sale of Gareth Bale to Real Madrid to make it himself.