Boleyn Ground

West Ham United supporter David Renwick has said that the only reason he’s going to the Hammers’ next home game is to buy the match programme.

The lifelong fan, 49, went so far as to admit that he might not even enter the ground after purchasing the magazine from his usual Green Street vendor.

He told friends: ‘I can barely be arsed. I’m only going to complete my collection’.

Renwick continued: ‘I might just get back in the car after. Really, I just don’t fancy it’.

Since purchasing his first programme on his maiden visit to the Boleyn Ground in 1977, Renwick has avidly bought the official club organ at every game he has attended, bar a match against Liverpool in 1988 when all copies had sold out.

Those closest to him have been quick to point out that Renwick has been known to make this threat on a  number of occasions, although he has never actually departed the area once the programme has been purchased. This was never more true than during Glenn Roeder’s spell in charge of the club in the mid 2000’s, when he was ready to tell anyone who’d listen that, ‘I’m going to give it all up, the fun’s gone out of it,’ despite never missing a game under the ex-QPR captain’s regime.